Road Trip Snacks Ranked Best To Worst

In part because of my work here at Jalopnik and in part because I just love driving, I find myself going on lots of lengthy road trips. I've just arrived home from a massive 16,000-mile road trip over the last two months. And that kind of mileage requires some serious snacking along the way. 

Snacks on the road are extremely helpful to keep your mind active, get the nutrition and energy you need, and continue making good time. Go to your average truck stop or gas station, fill up on fuel, shop for a few non-fuel products, and you'll also see potentially hundreds of different food options for shoving into your gaping maw while controlling a multi-ton mechanical device and looking at your phone. Some of those food options are better than others, though, and I'm going to make the definitive worst and best lists for your next road trip.

Obviously, there are a few criteria we have to keep in mind that make a certain snack good for a road trip. The number one consideration is how easy or difficult it is to handle. You want something you can unwrap, hold, and bite with one hand so you always maintain contact with the steering wheel. Tacos are a bad idea, so they're not even in the conversation. You want something calorie-dense, not too sweet so as to avoid a sugar crash, and reasonably healthy because driving is a sedentary activity and you won't be getting exercise on a long road trip. 

My unequivocal favorite thing to eat on a road trip is gummy worms, because they're delicious and don't generally cause a mess, but they're not really a great choice here because they're packed with sugar. I'm putting gummy worms as kind of the baseline snack. Let's look at the polar ends of the snack debate.

5. Chips and Crackers

This is on the list mostly because if you give them to a child, they will invariably end up ground into the car's upholstery. Especially the cheese-filled sandwich crackers. Chips are common, but they're so greasy and flavor dust gets everywhere. These are fine for most adults, but there are way better snacks.

4. Peanuts (with the shell)

What is this, a Five Guys Burgers and Fries? You want to deal with cracking and shelling peanuts, a task that typically requires both hands, while you're ostensibly focused on keeping your car on the road? Peanuts are fine enough, I suppose, if they're pre-shelled, but it's still kind of a boring snack. 

3. Yogurt

Spoon and cup? No. Yogurt in a tube? Even worse. Most dairy-based snacks should be immediately disregarded from any road trip. There are so many ways that yogurt can go poorly, it shouldn't even enter the conversation. Imagine dropping some into the thick pile carpet of your vintage Rolls-Royce. Ew.

2. Fruit

Certain fruits get a pass, like apples, pre-separated orange slices in a plastic baggie, and bananas. The berries and grapes, however, are a bad idea. First of all, you'll drop at least a few berries, and they'll hide under your seat and rot. Secondly, you're going to get blueberry stains on your fingers, clothes, and nice seats. Get it together.

1. Pizza

Pizza isn't a snack. It's a meal, duh! While pizza can typically be eaten one-handed, it still requires a plate and your full attention. You're never more than a few poorly-timed potholes or bridge expansion joints away from a slop of greasy cheese and mushrooms pouring off the bread funnel and onto your shirt. That's just messy, and depending on how fresh/hot the pizza is, it could even be painful. 

5. Bars

Every time I leave for a road trip, I make sure there are at least a small handful of bars in the car. My go-to recently has been the Clif Bar white chocolate and macadamia nut flavor. The cookies and cream and trail mix bars are also good. These work as a meal replacement if you're out somewhere without a good place to stop, or if you're behind schedule and can't make an extra stop.

4. Empanadas/hand pies

If you're good at making food at home, you might craft some empanadas or hand pies before you hit the road. You can put whatever you want inside that dough, so make sure if you do multiple flavors you keep them marked. You don't want to mix up the curry beef with the cherry-filled. Both can be eaten with one hand, and if you're not overzealous with the filling, they should be reasonably tidy. 

3. Coffee

In spite of its diuretic nature, coffee is an absolute necessity for long days on the road. I don't drink soda, so I need something to keep me awake and focused. Just make sure you don't spill. Tea is fine if you don't like the flavor of java. Don't forget to drink your water, though. 

2. GORP

Good 'ol raisins and peanuts. This energy-bumping snack has been the go-to for hikers and outdoorspeople for decades. It's hard to beat a GORP with the right mix. 

1. Jerky

There's no way it could be anything else. Jerky is the undisputed champion of road trip snacks. Even if you don't eat beef or pork products, you can find some plant-based vegan jerky on the shelves that isn't bad. I'm personally a pescatarian and I brought some salmon jerky with me on my trip to Canada, and it was positively delightful.