A Backwards Slalom Race Is The Right Way To Do Qualifying

Are you the aging oligarch of a major racing series? Are you tired of seeing cars qualify on ovals one at a time? Have you grown bored of qualifying formats that people understand? Are you looking to spice things up for no reason? The backwards slalom is the answer.

This backwards slalom race was used to determine which sucker got pole position at the 24 Hours of LeMons 10th Anniversary "Decade of Disappointment" race at Gingerman Raceway.

Clearly, this is a much superior way of determining the pole sitter to that elimination qualifying garbage Formula One tried to force on everyone this year.

One of the most majestic sights from the contest was this twin-V8-engined 1971 Cadillac Eldorado. One 500 cubic inch engine was up front, and the car's original 500 cubic inch engine was in the back. Somehow, this approximately 5,500-pound behemoth navigated the slalom like a champ.

The Caddy more than made up for this act of grace when its front engine gave up during the race, per Nathan Schlawin's comment on his video. Because that one was connected to the car's the brakes and the steering, they had to put the car's rear engine back in the front to get on track.

As Craigslist would say, "emaculent."