At $1,600, Would You Tackle This 1984 BMW 633CSI Project?

It's a new year, and that means new opportunities and resolutions. Today's Nice Price or No Dice 633CSI offers an intriguing opportunity and will demand some resolve to get back on its feet. Let's see if it's right-priced or is a lost cause.

A common mantra in business is to "work smarter, not harder." In the racing world, we've also been told to "run whatcha brung," meaning to make the most of what happens to be available in the moment.

For the carmaker, Chrysler, both adages seem apropos, as the company long sought to make do with what it had on hand, leveraging toss-off platforms from bygone makes it had acquired, or from whichever partner or parent it considered its latest sugar daddy. The 2002 Chrysler 300M Special we looked at last Wednesday is a prime example of a car that melded old with new and made do with what was on hand at the time. While reasonably popular in its day, like most of Mopar's mainstream models from the past three decades or so, these cars proved unmemorable, and at $7,800, our bruised but still-capable candidate came across in the comments as one that most of you would just as soon forget again. A massive 90% 'No Dice' loss was the result.

Typically, when a carmaker makes radical changes to the underpinnings of a particular model, they like to gussy up the bodywork, letting buyers and others know that something's gone on under the skin. A notable exception is BMW and its E24 series of large coupes. Initially constructed using the chassis and suspension of the E12 5 Series, the 6 Series was later upgraded to the more modern underpinnings of the E28 5 Series around the halfway point of the executive two-door's model run. Only savvy observers can pick out the visual differences denoting each iteration (hint: look at the height of the swage line relative to the front wheel arch), as BMW didn't call out the mechanical updates with significant bodywork changes.

Of course, it wasn't required as the E24's Paul Bracq design was near perfection from the get-go. An evolution of the preceding E9 coupe's design, the E24 smoothed and modernized the look without sacrificing the uniquely BMW design elements buyers and marque enthusiasts had come to expect.

Today's 1984 633CSI embodies all of those styling tropes—the canted-forward 'shark nose,' narrow twin kidney grilles, and Hofmeister Kink applied to the C-pillar being among the most notable. This being a 1984 edition also means that it rides on the more capable and surefooted E28-shared suspension, making it perhaps all the more desirable.

Many of you might not be paying attention to any of those details, though, as they seem to be masked by a patina of failing clear coat, a smattering of bodywork rust, and an interior that beloved Peanuts character Pigpen would gladly call home.

Yes, you figured it out, this is a project car. It needs... (scans ad)...darn-near everything. For those of you wondering where to start on such a daunting project, I think we might all agree that a tetanus booster would be a good jumping-off point.

Fortunately, aside from a side-marker lens, the shift knob, and, most ominously, the lower half of the steering column where the ignition switch is housed, the car appears complete and, hence, more of a viable project than a parts car.

According to the ad, the engine starts and runs, which is another plus. The underhood shot shows the 3,210 cc M30 SOHC straight-six to be complete, though, like the interior, a bit dusty. In this model year, the engine offered a factory-claimed 181 horsepower and 195 pound-feet of torque, although considering this car's claimed 291,000 miles (yes, you read that right), it's anybody's guess how much oomph is still available.

Paired with the stoic six is the preferred gearbox: a Getrag 265 five-speed manual. Prospective buyers should not be asking about clutch wear or synchro whine, as the miles, years, and neglect this car has endured will require a review and likely a renewal of every component from top to bottom.

Of course, the next owner will need to call a tow or "bring a trailer" to cart this coupe away. Based on the pictures, the tires (mounted on what look to be BBS basketweaves) still hold air, but probably shouldn't be counted on to do much more than that. Also, the interior shouldn't be entered without a hazmat suit, so driving before a major deep cleaning is not advisable. The seller says the title is clean and the car will come with a bill of sale, as title transfer will prove difficult, seeing as the car is not prepared to pass (or even study for) the state-required smog test.

While this project will demand a lot from the person who takes it on, we now need to decide whether such heroic efforts are worthwhile at the car's $1,600 asking price. That's a bit of a pittance, and for anyone with the space, might be a reasonable expenditure just for the handsome piece of yard art this E24 offers.

What do you say? Is $1,600 a fair price for a classic BMW coupe that needs pretty much everything? Or is that too much to tackle the expense, workload, and potential Hantavirus risk this Bimmer entails?

You decide!

Nice Price or No Dice:

Los Angeles, California, Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.

H/T to Don R. for the hookup!

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