Commenter Of The Day, Gravel In Your Guts Edition

Señor Loverman usually does this here COTD thing, but he had to go to Kiev to pistol-whip some discipline into the crew running his lucrative spam operation. So, while he's applying some persuasion to those ZAZ-driving hackers, I'm handling the COTD duties for the day. Sometimes we give the COTD award to a commenter who gets all erudite on us, throwing in references to great works of literature and so on. Other times, the commenter who fires off a short, witty one-liner gets the nod. Today's COTD winner has managed to do both...

I speak, of course, of LascauxCaveman and his comment on today's Classic Ad Watch post:

I shot a harmful engine deposit in Reno, just to watch him die.

Great job, Lascaux! But we're not done yet- we have a Bonus Commenter of the Day Award to issue as well. Last Friday, we had Project Car Hell go up after that day's COTD... which means that a great comment sort of fell through the cracks. But we've fished that comment out of the cracks, and we're giving a belated COTD to Rust-MyEnemy, whose PCH-themed rewriting of the lyrics to Tom Waits' "What's He Building In There?" in the Tom Waits Edition PCH knocked us all on our collective tuchuses:

What's he building in there?
What the hell is he building
In there?
He has subscriptions to hot-rod
Magazines... He never
Waves when he drives by
He's hiding all that rust from
non Bel air drivers... He's all
To himself... I think I know
Why... He's been trying to patch the chassis
on his '58 bel air
He sold his children and pets to
pay for repair....He failed his smog
And suspect big ends and
His funds are dying... and
What about all spares in the yard?
What's he building in there?
With that project started.
If he dares. What's he building
In there... I'll tell you one thing
He's not building a Corvette to go
hooning around in.
Whats he building In there?

Now what's that sound from under the door?
He's got it started, I can hear
it roar. and I
Swear to god I heard his wife
Moaning low... and I keep
Seeing the light of a welder, show...
He has an air-wrench
And tranny parts galore... and you
somehow know hes' done this before.
His wife has filed for car-based
divorce... But this hasn't eswaged him form tink'ring, of course... What's he building
In there. What the hell is he
Building in there? I heard he
found some spare parts in
a field in Tennessee,
And he gave up on life to build
a Chevy that would please 'ya...
but what is he building in there?
What the hell is building in there?

He has no friends
And you can hear him wail
when he finds another hole
on the chassis rail...
I heard he was working on the
brakes last night night
Administering the last rites
And what are those curses
he's always shouting?....
What's he building in there?
What's he building in there?

We have a right to know...

Bel Air