At $17,900, Are Two Hummers Better Than One?

The ad for today's Nice Price or No Dice Humvee is actually a twofer, offering a pair of the military machines in a package deal. Let's determine if the two together are priced to make one new owner extremely happy.

A Ferrari needs to offer two things. The first is performance. Any Ferrari ought to, at the very least, make its driver feel like Lewis Hamilton. The second thing a Ferrari needs to be is sexy. Its lines, its leather, the wail of its exhaust should make its driver feel like they're... well, Lewis Hamilton, or at least one of his sexy friends.

Unfortunately, the 1986 Ferrari Mondial 3.2 cabriolet we looked at last Friday offered neither of those attributes. With just 270 horsepower on tap and a wavy-gravy convertible body, that 2+2 could easily suffer the indignity of getting its doors blown off by a V6 Camry. Being a 2+2 also severely diminishes its sexiness quotient. Who wants to even think about sexy time when you've got the kids in tow in the back seats? That all conspired to make our Mondial a uniquely unfavorable Ferrari, earning its $49,750 asking price a solid 64% 'No Dice' loss.

It's a rare occurrence to have one icon concurrently replaced by another. More typically, when something or someone enters the social zeitgeist, it's a one-and-done affair. That hasn't been the case with America's light-duty military vehicles, however. Arising out of the Second World War as the "truck that won the war," the utilitarian Jeep entered both the American social consciousness and a lot of people's lives when civilian production arrived. So strong is the history and lore of the Jeep that it remains in production to this day and is recognized the world over.

That icon may have stood alone if it weren't for its successor, the High Mobility Multipurpose Wheeled Vehicle (HMMWV). Entering service in the 1980s after a successful bid by South Bend, Indiana's AM General, the Hummer is arguably as well known and recognizable globally as the Jeep. Like its forbears, it also entered into civilian service. The HMMWV is as much an icon of this century's American military as the Jeep was for the second half of the last.

Today, we're looking at not one but two military-grade Hummers. The first is a 1994 A1 edition, set up as a mechanic's truck, with a utility box on the back outfitted with toolboxes, an electrical inverter, an air compressor, and a mobile welder. What more could an industrious boy or girl want?

According to the ad, this truck "was rebuilt from factory with new engine and drivetrain and has 500 miles on it." It's a head-scratcher what they mean by "rebuilt from factory," although a picture is provided of a badge reading VSE Corporation, which is a refurbishment company. The work must have been a success as the seller claims this truck to be their daily driver. It has a naturally aspirated Chevy diesel under the hood and looks ready for any sort of shenanigans one might want to get into with it. Should the utility box not be to a new owner's liking, it appears to be removable with not much fuss. On the other hand, clearing out some space and adding in a mattress and ice cooler might make this one of the most badass overlanders money could buy.

The other half of this package deal is a 2002 A2 painted Desert Storm tan. Instead of a utility box, it comes with a canvas cover in the back. Under that frumy cover lies the truck's transmission. This Hummer was apparently purchased as a parts truck for the meanie greenie, but the seller claims it could be made operable with little effort. It also has a new engine—another non-turbo diesel from the Bow Tie folks—but will need to be towed due to that niggling issue of the transmission not being where it's supposed to be. On the plus side, it comes partnered with a truck that should be fully able to tow it, no problem.

Craigslist

This one has stake bed sides under the canvas, and an extra set of doors in the bed. Both trucks have removable tops over the driver and passenger seats; the one on the green truck reportedly being new.

According to the seller, the title (at least on the green truck) is clean. It also has a mere 500 miles under its tires since the refurb. While it sports a Montana plate, it's offered for sale deep in the heart of Colorado, an entire state away. The tan truck, on the other hand, doesn't seem to be presently registered for the road, but how hard could that be? Together, they could take up all the space in a new owner's driveway for the package price of $17,900.

What's your take on that price and this pair? Does that seem like a deal to get not just one icon but two? Or for that much, would you thank them for their service, but say no thank you to their purchase?

You decide!

Nice Price or No Dice:

Denver, Colorado, Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.

H/T to RevUnlimiter for the hookup!

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